Communication--ppfffft! It's so important and yet whhhhyyyyyyy is it so complicated to pull off? Today I dive into the famous "I" Message. There are so many ways to get it wrong, lets go over how to do it right!
The "I" Message (the extended version)
I feel _________ (emotion) when you __________ (factual observation) because _________ I (unfulfilled need, desire, hope, value, or expectation). I would like us to talk about this.
When to use it--When someone's actions have caused a reaction in you, and you would like to come together and clarify how to correct it.
Feelings--You're actually wanting to share an emotion, not just a feeling.
What the other person did--describe the behavior objectively, like a factual observation. Not with judgement words that are either insulting or diffuse what actually happened.
Why it bothered you--what value, hope, need, desire or expectation was not fulfilled by the other person's actions?
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